Lost on Sunday

GuruDheva.. Why you have done like this to me. what is there in your mind. I thought i would be separated from Anu but what happened there. Atlast as you shown already i lost in the final. we went to Sir office and he is scolding me only and he is taking about the money only and not even about her. why you are doing like this to me and why he does not want me to get out of bangalore and he wants me in bangalore itself. he asked me that whether i am having money or not as a good i told him that i dont have money so he given the money but he told to madan and others scold me like anything. why he is playing the double game. he complained me that i should go to phycatrist not anu. why all are playing like this. Everyone speaks about the money only not the feeling what i felt. Since my parents told only i went to meet her. For that one also my father scold me that why did you went to melcote to meet her. you should have gone straight to mysore and she should come there. They dont want to leave me and they know that she is giving tourcher and they did not want to leave me. so they are using sir as the biggest weapon. He is also very cunning and i know that if i go and settle in bangalore even both will not treat me as a dog also. i know that i will win this battle atlast. i want to separate from Anu and i want to lead the life peacefully. i met with the accident on Monday night while i was returning from bangalore to hosur. i got wound in the hand so i stayed back in the denkanikotta for two days and yesterday i came back from there to chennai. she does not want to come from bangalore and to stay in chennai. she wants me to take control and she wants to lead relationship with sir and to live there only. she is telling me that she will stay in bangalore and she wants me to visit everyweek and she will lead the life there. i am praying to him that i should separate from and her i know that she is planning for the bigger tourcher to me in another way so next time damsure i will do sucide do this. she will not try to do. she will even kill me. She does not want to come and stay in denkanikotta. The thing is she wants me to come and fell her in leg. even sir is scolding for this one. i dont know why this is happeneing. and what will happen. i am planning to visit maduranthagam Eri katha ramar temple in my mind he is asking me to visit him. so i am going to pray him and GuruDheva also told me to visit him and ask him for to save you. Day before yesterday i was asking GuruDheva to show him but he showed me two tigers and i am running away from them in fear that whether it will eat me to hurt me. but the people are there with them as Dog and they are playing with them. So after thinking i came to know that i only feeling myself away from the tigers that it wants to be with them and they will help them. in natural i dont know how i am going to give myself to them. i want to settle all the things. GuruDHeva if you are there then help me otherwise. please take my life away that will be helpful for me and others will have a lesson in life that no one should do this in there life.